L

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Monday, 22 October 2012

Feedbacks and comments on Casually in love behaviors of this generation.


  1. I disagree with your point that teenagers are not mature enough to have girl or boy friend. You have point out that there are short-term relationship trend within teenagers. I think even within adult the short-term relationship still happens. For example, it is very often for us to see in the news that actors or singers have break up with their girl or boy friends within a week. Also, the divorce rate has increased every year around the world, for instant in NZ one third of marriage are ending in divorce. For those people who allow to get married, they are adults, and they are mature enough to know what they want and who they want to be with. If the short term relationship happens within the adults, why should we tell teenagers that they are not mature enough to have relationship with the girls or boys that they like?
    The formula that you give for the short term relationship ‘love- get bored-break up-started again’, in the second stage when you say ‘get bored’, I think this is not the reason why teenagers break up, the main reasons for them to break up it is because when they are together they know more about each other, and because of different habit, different point of view, different thought, etc. Which make them to feel that they are not right for each other, and eventually break up.
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  2. thanks for sharing your thought Sophie :) it's great to read another point of view.
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  3. I agree with the increasing trend of casual relationships but it is true for adults as well, not just teenagers. I think the media is responsible for this trend. A lot of movies these days involve characters with friends with benefits relationships and in real life, celebreties are displaying examples of these short term relationships.
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  4. Hey Luke,
    i really like this topic, it's cool!
    nowsday, a growing number of divoice rate caused by the lacke of self-awareness.
    i think in order to keep a happniess and stable marriage, people should be a real independent adult and have responsible. as parents, they should guide their child find a correct way. the young should know themselves more accurately. when the shorot-term relationship finish, their heart will hurt deeply.
    good job luke~
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  5. thank Hwang and Xu Liu for your time reading my blog! Hope you guys enjoy it! :)
    ReplyDelete
  6. It's mostly hearsay, there are large sections of your ideas with no links to support them. It makes it seem like it is all just your opinion, and your opinions on there own are not concrete, is hard to figure out what you are actualy able to back up.
    Also you grammer is wrong to the point of making it hard to read, however since you are talking about love I actualy find I can understand. comments like "this is no" make sense when discussing love.
    I loooove your closing line and think it would be a helpful message for many kids to hear. However, throughout your actual argument your point gets confused and it makes it feel rambley.
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  7. Hey Luke.
    The first thing I have to commend you on is your responses to the other comments. It's nice to see someone who can react positively to a negative comment like Sophie's, and can bother to thank those who liked it. Good on you.

    As for your grammar, as English is (I'm assuming) your second or third language, I have no problems. It was understandable, and in my opinion that's enough for a blog. ;)

    I agree with your points about young people getting married based on false ideals, or unrealistic dreams, without thinking it through. However, Sophie did make a good point also about this applying to adults as well, sometimes as much as to teenagers. Perhaps next time (if there is a next time) you could try focusing on how divorce is becoming more common and/or how marriage is becoming less popular among people in general, not just young people.

    Nevertheless, It was good. The anecdote (or story) about your friend was good and illustrated the point well.

    Well done!
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  8. BTW, I meant "I have no problems with your level of grammar". Oops. My own grammar needs a bit of work.
    ReplyDelete
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Thursday, 20 September 2012

Draft - Links which will use in the blog

http://www.ivillage.com/7-reasons-men-love-casual-relationships/4-a-284213
Annotation: This article points out the reason why men prefer casual relationship
http://snigs1spot.wordpress.com/2007/11/18/playing-with-peoples-emotions/
Annotation: This blogger has a post about people who playing with relationship, playing with other feelings.
http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-A-Casual-Relationship-For-You?-The-Pros-And-Cons-Of-Being-A-Mans-Friend-With-Benefits&id=7034009
Annotation: The article about pros and cons of casual relationship.
http://www.tapchilamdep.com/dan-ong/chia-se/Gia_ngay_ay_em_dung_de_dai-57926.dep
Annotation: A story about a girl who being casually in love and then pay the heavy price later in her married relationship.
http://vietbao.vn/The-gioi-tre/De-dai-trong-tinh-yeu-la-ha-thap-chinh-minh/70021613/504/
Annotation: This article from Vietnam about casually in love means lowering your own self-esteem.
http://afamily.vn/tam-su-ban-doc/3920/Hau-qua-cua-tinh-voi-vang-va-de-dai.chn
Annotation: The article from Vietnam about the consequences of casual love.
http://en.allexperts.com/q/Teen-Dating-Issues-849/2011/10/want-casual-relationship-serious.htm
http://ask.metafilter.com/218571/Like-Being-a-Teenager
http://www.teenforumz.com/relationships-dating-crushes/30989-casual-relationships.html
http://www.tin247.com/cai_gia_phai_tra_cho_su_de_dai-18-21785592.html

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Wednesday, 19 September 2012

What would caused you if you are casually in love?




Nowadays, many teenagers casually in love, playing with other people hearts. On the other hand, there are millions of weddings which the grooms and prides are still very young. Especially girls, many have already get married while they are 18, 19 years old.


Why?


I will discuss this matter based on the critical current states of teenagers from where I grown-up, which is Vietnam. One of them is “Short-term relationships are a trend”

The formula of these kinds of relationship is: Love – Get bored – Break up – Start again. People called this “Short-term relationship”.

When falling in love, these people always gave their all in love, when it turns a little bad, they just bailed out and escape from it. They don’t actually trying to fix the problem. Until the list of their “unfinished” love get longer and longer, most of them starting to get frustrated and lost faith in love. My opinion on this: People thought that short-term relationship is LOVE but just did not work out due to unlucky or did not fit for each other. The fact is no, it was not LOVE. The consequences of this cause these people to get pragmatic, and get harder to fall in love. Identically, they lower their standard too. Click here for an article in Vietnam about this matter.

It was one of the consequences of casually in love.

The psychology of teenagers there which usually want to prove to everyone that “Look at me! I am a grown up person!”


Always, teenagers want to do things that prove to everyone that they have grown up, to prove that they are now can decide what to do with their life. Many of couples who have dated for a long time, decided to get married very soon just to live with their “other half”, see that they are from a wealthy families which can provide their life fully even if they are get married and still have no jobs, careers yet right now.


For example, I will tell you a story of my friend, Mai. Many years ago, when she still was a high school student, when she still have not graduated yet, she told her parent that after graduation, she want to marry the guy which she has love for 3 years during her time as a high school student.  She stated that “I have already grown up! I want to get married! I don’t mind if I am going to be happy or misery after that, I can take on anything because he loves me, and our love is strong.”


After the graduation day, she finally got married and continued the lifestyle which is “leeching parent money”. Only thing, Mai was not parasitic her parent but parasites … the parents-in-law. Even though, their families known that Mai and her boyfriend’s love was not mature enough but they could not stop Mai because Mai and her boyfriend keep putting on the pressure, and even secretly registered their married.


Also, there are many girls think that they would be too old, too late to get marry at 26-27s. That is why when they meet those boyfriends who are older than them one or two years old, graduated, employed, have the ability to earn money, they would be gladly to be their wives.


On the other hand, there are girls who still are teenagers, think that they are at the best period of their life. They think that if they get marry right now, they would be the most beautiful bride than they could ever be years later. Moreover, they even fantasize that if they get marry soon, they would have someone always cares for them, treats them like a queen, which would get many other girls at the same age dying from jealousy. Click to read some conversation about how teenagers treat relationship nowaday.


However, after that “fairy tale” dream is the responsibilities of being a daughter-in-law, being a wife, being a mother, which is very important and difficult for teenagers, something that many of them could not foreseen. Click for more reading about this point.


Back to Mai, she was once a very popular girl of my high school, after graduated and get married. She thought that she could enjoy her love life fullest, no need to worry about anything else. Well, she was wrong. After get married, she gave birth to a twins not long after that, she faced many challenges in her life than she did ever before. There are hundreds of things to take care of, hundreds of things to worry about in a family. After some times, nobody could ever imagine that Mai, once a very popular girl, turned older tremendously compare to other people of her age. Click for another touching story of a girl who used be casually in love. and Click for some more pros and cons of casual relationship.


Conclusion, after those things I mentioned above was one of the consequences of being rush falling in love, which easily lead into get marry without having a serious thought about it. The message I want to tell you guys is pretty simple, “Love when you are ready, not because you are lonely”.

Cheers.


References:
Like Being a Teenager: Ask MetaFilter. (2012, June 25). Retrieved September 10, 2012, from Ask MetaFilter: http://ask.metafilter.com/218571/Like-Being-a-Teenager

M.White, K. (2012, May 2). Is A Casual Relationship For You? The Pros And Cons Of Being A Man's "Friend With Benefits": Ezine article. Retrieved September 10, 2012, from Ezine Article: http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-A-Casual-Relationship-For-You?-The-Pros-And-Cons-Of-Being-A-Mans-Friend-With-Benefits&id=7034009

Minh. (2011, June 10). Hau qua cua tinh voi vang va de dai: afamily.vn. Retrieved September 10, 2012, from afamily.vn: http://afamily.vn/tam-su-ban-doc/3920/Hau-qua-cua-tinh-voi-vang-va-de-dai.chn

Nguyen, T. H. (2005, August 26). De dai trong tinh yeu la ha thap chinh minh: VietBao.vn. Retrieved September 10, 2012, from VietBao.vn: http://vietbao.vn/The-gioi-tre/De-dai-trong-tinh-yeu-la-ha-thap-chinh-minh/70021613/504/

Phunutoday. (2011, September 28). Gia ngay ay em dung ... de dai: tapchilamdep.vn. Retrieved September 10, 2012, from Tap Chi Lam Dep: http://www.tapchilamdep.com/dan-ong/chia-se/Gia_ngay_ay_em_dung_de_dai-57926.dep
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